Note: I wrote this on three hours of sleep. Be warned. All links nsfw.
As the temperature of lesbians approaches absolute zero, they cease to exist. They don’t die, they just cease to exist. Let me demonstrate with some very scientific hyperlinks.
Here we have a google search for hot lesbians which returns roughly 1.4 million results. It follows from this that “hot” is the temperature the average lesbian thrives in.
Now we have a search for cool lesbians that returns a mere 2,500 results.
A search for “cold lesbians” gives a shocking 348 results.
Frigid lesbians: 69 results.
Frozen lesbians: 7 results.
And finally, Absolute zero lesbians: 0 results.
Theory: undoubtedly proven. Go science! (Which is how I will conclude all scientific papers from now on.)